God alone knows what you did to get sent here, to Bureau 13 within the FBI - the dumping ground for
kooks and wash-ups that won't accept early retirement or resign. You pissed off the wrong person, screwed up one time too manyor were just plain unlucky. Bureau 13 is sent off on every lousy, weird scut detail imaginable - jobs that the Government has to appear to be responsive to, but ultimately are meaningless wastes of time that only placate a pushy, internet scandal-ridden public.
Crop circles, cow killings, vampire sightings, dead schools of fish, mysterious lightscrap even the local cops don't want to waste their time with. They buck it on to an FBI only too happy to punish wayward agents, and tell their local constituents that the Feds will resolve it. You've heard rumors that sometimes this stuff is real, but all the crap you've seen has been a complete waste of timelike the hairy naked survival nut who started a rash a rash of Big Foot sightings in the backwoods of Oregonor the circus freak promoter and his "Leech Boy" in the Florida Everglades-a rubber suit and more mosquitoes than Satan himself could ever want. You've even been stuck working Sci-Fi conventions to keep tabs on conspiracy nuts. But its either this, try to redeem yourself, or with a "no comment" termination from the FBI, end up as a security guard at Macy's.
Most Bureau-13 agents are based in Oklahoma, in a run down facility in the FBI annex in Tulsa. Other Bureau-13 offices are located in Oakland, CA; and Hopewell, VA in decommissioned military facilities that hail from WWIIor perhaps even WWI. Field workers are sent out to deal with reports and conduct inquiries from these inconvenient staging areas - given the oldest of cars, and the cheapest of economy-class airfare.
Bureau-13's size fluctuates, but there are usually only about 20-40 ornery, stubborn people who've refused all of the FBI's hints to "take a hike - we'd fire you if we could, but we can'tat least, not yet, but we're working on it!" Some are indeed waste-cases on the edge of burn out, or incompetent - others are good field agents having a bad day. The titular head of Bureau-13 may be your biggest foe -- Randy Pike is trying his hardest to get out of Bureau-13 by proving how effective he is at saving money for the FBI by forcing agents to resign, and scrimping every penny he can. Hell, he's only 5 years from retirement anyway, and you ain't gonna screw that up for him! But if you're really sharp, you might get a real case, like a diamond in the manure pile, and get yourself back on the fast track to a real career!
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